April 4, 2012

Looking Queer

After Common Ground, I realized just how visible and heavy my identities are.  I wear them on my chest, like buffers between me and other people.  When I take them off, I feel empty.

I can never step out of my skin as a woman of color.  I could pretend to have money, but I quit that phase after Sophomore year.  What has been bothering me lately is the idea that one of my identities is not clearly marked.

I can step in and out of being gay.  I can "pass".  And furthermore, most people assume that I'm straight.  I'm not really okay with that.

So I pierced my lip.  I told a friend that I wanted to look more "queer".  I don't know if this metal in my skin makes that much of a difference to the outside world, but to me, it's a stop sign.

It's a well-known and perpetually lived fact that as people, we evaluate one another based on physical characteristics.  We then place people into boxes according to what we see.  This is my small and personal way of checking my own box.  


  1. Hey!

    So funny enough, I have kind of the opposite problem as a straight female who is mistaken as queer more often than I used to be comfortable with.

    Personally, I'm not really about using a personal choice (such as a piercing) in order to indicate sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression, and I don't think think that lip piercings are inherently queer.

    But, I know a lot of people who try to use rainbow gauges, beads in piercing etc. in order to differentiate themselves. So maybe you could try something like that. Best of luck!


  2. it looks kick-ass! (but you must have known this already!)

    keep up the awesomeness.

  3. that piercing on you looks so sexy!