October 1, 2012

Anonymous Posts (9.24.12-9.30.12)

Every week, we collect anonymous entries sent in using the link on our sidebar and post them all on Monday. We post anything as long as it doesn't contain personal attacks, hate speech, or express or insinuate that one is at risk for hurting themselves or someone else. Please read this for an explanation of this policy and seek help if your or a friend find yourself in that position. With those exceptions aside, please feel free to submit your thoughts and questions. :)

Hey there! I hope all of you who came out to pride enjoyed yourselves, despite all of that rain. We've definitely heard a lot of positive feedback about our presence there. We wish you the best of luck on your upcoming midterms (if you have any) and give you these anonymous posts:

I'm gay. It's not something that I can be open about, especially to my family, and it's something that I rarely bring up around my friends, or even people I know pretty well. I don't think I've thought of it as something that people should know upright, as something of a status that I post on facebook : "interested in: women," or about any of my past relationships either. I'm gay, but it's not something that I try to think about all the time. College is hard. Classes are challenging. Life and all the things that it throws at you; tests and midterms and school assignments, stress and more stress; I feel like there isn't any time for this. If there's some one out there who I can love and be happy with, I'm sure that we'll meet eventually. For the time being, I don't know what to do else other than whatever I have time for outside of classes. and stress. I don't know.

An article about "gaycism". This is something I think everyone needs to read. Click here.


  1. Good lord--# 1--I am right there with you. Thank you so much for posting that. I feel like I've thought those exact thoughts over and over. I've graduated from Duke, I'm in med school now, and I feel like there's even less time to "waste" thinking about the possibility of my being gay or bi or interested in women now, too. I feel like I don't have the time or energy left to be able to say, "Hey everybody, ___________!" (I put the blank because I don't even know what I'd say--I hate the labels, so I'd probably just say that I love all people, any people, whatever people happen to tickle my fancy.) BUT at the same time, I still WANT any potential suitors to know that I might be interested, so keeping quiet about the whole thing and being more passive is hard as well.

    I implore you to take advantage of whatever amount of time you have left at Duke to explore yourself. Once you leave, at least in my experience, reality hits, and it's a lot harder because there's more pressure to have stuff figured out. I'd give anything to have just one more year to go back to Duke and have the support of my friends and the LGBT center and the community as a whole so that I could struggle with my shit WITH people instead of feeling like I'm doing it alone. I hope you find happiness.

  2. @#1

    I know it's tough, but think of the hundreds of people who ARE our here and find someone your trust and talk to them about it!

  3. #2 - great article!

    #1 - i think this is an interesting point. it's true; finding someone after Duke is easier (well, if you have the mobility/option to go to a bigger city or more accepting place). if you want, maybe try just focusing on improving your acceptance with self, and not on getting a boyfriend/girlfriend/partner? i'm not sure if that makes sense, but to just keep working on you. college is a beautiful time for that. and then generally i think that makes people very attractive! to be working on themselves, into their own things, etc. and so it might just come your way when you aren't even expecting it. good luck :)

  4. #2- Very interesting article! That being said, I think the author is WAY off about Modern Family (I'm only talking about Modern Family because it's the only show he listed I watch regularly). Firstly, Gloria is not the only character of color. She has a Hispanic son, and the Gay couple have an Asian daughter together. Also, I completely disagree with his assertion that Gloria's character exists to provide comic relief. Her "language problems" are mocked to show the innocence of such mistakes, not to marginalize her for her race/ethnicity. This show is all about building up stereotypes and then having them come crashing down by the end of each episode. We can see this in how each character plays some kind of "stereotypical" role: The husbands are jockish and hardheaded;the wives are portrayed as sensitive and emotional; the children all range from "dumb and promiscuous" to "intelligent but excruciatingly awkward". While I think the author of this article points out a lot of important things about our society, I also think he got this one show wrong.