Every week, we collect anonymous entries sent in using the link on our sidebar and post them all on Monday. We post anything as long as it doesn't contain personal attacks, hate speech, or express or insinuate that one is at risk for hurting themselves or someone else. Please read this for an explanation of this policy and seek help if your or a friend find yourself in that position. With those exceptions aside, please feel free to submit your thoughts and questions. :)
The Bar held a welcome back night for students on Friday, and I hear it was poppin. This week is also going to be POPPIN on campus. Are you ready!?
Hudson Taylor, founder of Athlete Ally, is speaking TODAY at 5:30pm. Women Loving Women (Tu, 6-8pm) and Spectrum (TH, 6-7pm) are also meeting this week!
ALSO BDU is working on an awesome new campaign that aims to bring visibility to and correct misconceptions around bisexuality and questioning. If you're interested in being pictured in a poster (you'll get to choose what it says), sign up here. We need people who identify as bi, questioning and ally!
#2
The last time I made the mistake of telling a straight girl I liked her, things got horrible. I will always have the story of how _____, that one straight girl, broke my heart. This time I was afraid of the same thing happening if a straight girl at Duke finds out I like her. Recently I told her I liked her and then came out to her a couple days later. She essentially rejected me, but it was probably the most awesome rejection I've ever gotten. She didn't flat out say no to me, she just told me about how she's dated girls before and it just wasn't for her and then told me how she's sorry she flirts with me a lot but that's her personality. It feels good to finally be out to one person at Duke. Now I have someone to talk to, but I just wish I'd stop falling for these dang straight girls all the time!
Please remember that there are a number of resources available on campus and in the local community. These resources are available over breaks and throughout the school year. If you or a friend are experiencing thoughts or urges to harm yourself or somebody else, please reach out to the following resources: In an emergency, please don't hesitate to call CAPS at any time, including "after hours" at (919) 966-3820. Ask to speak to the advice nurse and tell them you are a Duke student. You may also call the Trevor Project, a national hotline specifically for lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, queer and questioning youth (college students included). Their number is 866-4-U-TREVOR (866-488-7386).
Hi Duke LGBTQ/questioning women's community! Have you heard of Women Loving Women (WLW)at Duke? We are a dinner and discussion group for graduate and undergraduate LGBTQ-identified and questioning women at Duke.
WLW is excited to be hosting its third and last MOVIE NIGHT of the semester this Saturday night at 6pm in the LGBT Center! We will be showing "Set it Off", a film about four women who band together to fight the system in a radical, kick-ass, (and hilarious) way.
*All LGBTQ and questioning identified women who are graduate or undergradute students at Duke are welcome to attend.* (We respect varying levels of "outness" with both our dinner discussion meetings, listserv, and informal events like these, and members of the group are not discussed beyond the event.)
Also, WLW is going to be having it's next and last monthly dinner/discussion meeting of the semester Sunday, December 11th from 6-8pm in the LGBT Center, so mark your calendar and RSVP to colleen.warner@duke.edu! This month's meeting and every meeting is open to all LGBTQ and questioning Duke undergraduate and graduate women-identified students. (If you're not on our WLW listserv but would like to be, please email myself, meganweinand@gmail.com or Janie (janie.long@duke.edu) and we'll be happy to add you to the private listserv.)
See you there! -Megan Event recaps:
1. WLW hosts "Set if Off" Movie Night When: This Saturday, December 3rd ; 6-8pm Where: LGBT Center
2. December's WLW meeting When: Sunday, December 11th, 6-8pm Where: LGBT Center Note: please RSVP to Colleen at colleen.warner@duke.edu with your meal preference (vegetarian or non-veg.) Also: TOPIC-Most likely an end-of-the-semester party! [Send us your other ideas to meganweinand@gmail.com!]
Hi Duke LGBTQ/questioning women's community! Have you heard of Women Loving Women (WLW) at Duke? We are a dinner and discussion group for graduate and undergraduate LGBTQ-identified and questioning women at Duke.
WLW is excited to be hosting its second MOVIE NIGHT of the year this Tuesday at 7:30pm in the LGBT Center! We will be showing "Gia", a film about American supermodel Gia Carangi, who first identified as a bisexual woman, and later a lesbian, during her modeling career that was characterized by a rapid rise to fame in the 70s/80s.
*All LGBTQ and questioning identified women who are graduate or undergradute students at Duke are welcome to attend.* (We respect varying levels of "outness" with both our dinner discussion meetings, listserv, and informal events like these, and members of the group are not discussed beyond the event.)
Also, WLW is going to be having it's next monthly dinner/discussion meeting November 15th from 6-8pm in the LGBT Center, so mark your calendar and RSVP to colleen.warner@duke.edu! This month's meeting and every meeting is open to all LGBTQ and questioning Duke undergraduate and graduate women-identified students. (If you're not on our WLW listserv but would like to be, please email myself, meganweinand@gmail.com or Janie (janie.long@duke.edu) and we'll be happy to add you to the private listserv.)
See you there! -Megan Event recaps:
1. WLW hosts "Gia" Movie Night: When: This Tuesday, Nov. 1st @7:30pm Where: LGBT Center
2. November's WLW meeting: When: Tuesday, November 15th, 6-8pm Where: LGBT Center Note: please RSVP to Colleen at colleen.warner@duke.edu with your meal preference (vegetarian or non-veg.) Also: TOPIC TBA-send us your ideas to meganweinand@gmail.com! y'all can choose what we talk about!
Have you heard of Women Loving Women (WLW) at Duke? We are a dinner and discussion group for graduate and undergraduate LGBTQ-identified and questioning women at Duke.
WLW is excited to be hosting a MOVIE NIGHT this Wednesday, October 12th at 7pm in the LGBT Center! All LGBTQ and questioning identified women who are graduate or undergradute students are welcome to attend. (We respect varying levels of "outness" with both our dinner discussion meetings, listserv, and informal events like these, and members of the group are not discussed beyond the event.) Wednesday's movie is planned to be "Frida" [Read about it here at Afterellen.com], which tells the story of the bisexual civil rights and women's rights activist and Mexican painter, Frida Kahlo.
Also, WLW is going to be having it's next monthly dinner/discussion meeting October 17th from 6-8pm in the LGBT Center. This month's topic is "Sexual Fluidity and Questioning", and if you'd like us to ask specific questions for dialogue, email myself (meganweinand@gmail.com) or Janie (janie.long@duke.edu) with your ideas for discussion questions for our meeting. Please RSVP to colleen.warner@duke.edu. This month's meeting and every meeting is open to all LGBTQ and questioning Duke undergraduate and graduate women-identified students. (If you're not on our WLW listserv but would like to be, please email myself or Janie and we'll be happy to add you to the private listserv.)
Event recaps:
1. MOVIE NIGHT - "Frida"hosted by WLW
When: This Wednesday, October 12th, 7pm
Where: The Center for LGBT Life
Note: There will be popcorn & beverages!!
2. Next WLW Meeting: "Sexual Fluidity and Questioning".
When: Monday, October 17th
Where: The Center for LGBT Life
RSVP to: colleen.warner@duke.edu
(please specifiy "vegetarian" meal if desired!)
Note: If you have a specific question that you'd like us to add to the list of discussion questions, please email Janie or myself (meganweinand@gmail.com; janie.long@duke.edu).
I recently just finished reading a great book callled, "Transgender History" by Susan Stryker, after it was recommended to me by Jack and Jess McDonald this summer. I was really impressed by Stryker's work and wanted to highlight her accomplishments here on the blog.
Susan Stryker is an openly transgender woman who has worked diligently to advance the transgender equality movement in America as a transgender historian. She recieved her Ph.D. in United States History at the University of California, Berkeley.
Stryker is a community-based historian, and she makes media and works to develop her community's history as a form of activism for the trans movement. Between 1997 and 2003 she worked as the Executive Director of the GLBT Historical Society in San Francisco, which works to preserve and further ongoing research in LGBTQ studies in one of the largest collections of queer history in the nation. She also is a vocal feminist, noting that as someone who previously presented to society as a white male, she has a "good yardstick" for measuring misogyny and sexism.
When I was reading "Transgender History" by Stryker this past month, I realized that San Francisco actually has a really rich trans history. In addition to the Compton Cafeteria Riots (see below!) and housing one of the best LGBTQ historical collections, San Francisco is also home to the country's first transgender activist group, "Transgender Nation", founded in SanFran. in 1992. The
organization worked successfully to begin integrating transgender concerns into the larger movement for LGBTQ equality. One of the activist demonstrations that TN was best known for was it's 1993 protest of the annual meeting of the American Psychiatric Association, in which the group rallied against the APA's diagnosis of the transgender identity as disordered (GID).
In addition to publishing "Transgender History" and many other works on transgender history, Stryker also co-directed the documentary, "Screaming Queens: The Riot at Compton's Cafeteria". (You can also find an Amazon trailer to the documentary that is a pretty good summary of it, here.) Here's an excerpt from the documentary below (there are some other great vintage footage portions on Youtube, too!)
"What happened at Compton's Cafteria that night wasn't a 'catfight' between screaming queens-it was a riot, and it kicked off a new human rights movement."
The documentary "Screaming Queens" covers the 1966 Compton Cafeteria Riots, which until this book (Transgender History) and this documentary, I knew very little about. It turns out that Stryker hadn't heard of the riots either, until she uncovered a vintage publication about them in the San Francisco GLBT historical society warehouses. The story goes that Gene Compton's cafeteria (at the corner of Turk and Taylor street) was a safe-haven in the Tenderloin district of San Francisco for transgender individuals (as well as other LGBQ individuals), and it was open 24/7.
"It was beautiful. Everybody would just die for window seats [at Compton's], just to show off. Jehovah's Witnesses used to drag crosses in the street in front of Compton's, and tell us we were going to burn in hell, but we ignored them. Compton's was fabulous. It was like Oz. Something like The Wizard of Oz."
The Tenderloin district of San Francisco had a police department that was allegedly paid off in order to keep the area open to prostitution and drug hustling, . The transgender and drag communities were eventually forced to the Tenderloin simply because restaurants, beauty shops, bars, and the hotels, etc. in other areas of the city wouldn't serve transgender people. The Tenderloin (and specifically, Turk Street), became known as "the gay ghetto", home to drag Balls and a larger transgender community. Not withstanding, the police could take transgender individuals as any time to jail for "female impersonation", and oftentimes they would:
"The first night I was in San Francisco I was arrested for 'sidewalk obstruction' by the 'tax squad', which was a police squad that generally made life unpleasant for people who didn't fit in. Later, I was arressted for 'female impersonation'. I never felt that I was impersonating female, I thought, I am a female!"
And while the Tenderloin was safer than other areas of San Francisco for transgender and queer individuals, it wasn't completely free of violence; there was once a serial kiler in the district who specifically targeted transgender individuals. The "Camelot" haven of the Gene Compton cafeteria didn't last forever either. When a new political activist group (composed of
many transgender individuals) named "Vanguard" started meeting at the restaurant, Compton's eventually started kicking them out. Nevertheless, Vanguard members picketed Compton's due to the discrimination they felt, which upset the Compton cafeteria management even further.
One night (the date is uncertain, but it is believed to be August 9th, 1966) the San.Fran. police department raided the cafeteria (presumably after conversations with the Compton management). Fighting started when a policeman grabbed one of the drag queens, and she threw coffee in his face. All hell broke loose after that, "triggering years of resentment", and "all the sugar shakers went through the windows and the glass doors." Police called for more backup as the fighting continued, and eventually a police car and a local newsstand were set on fire. (Business at Compton's never recovered, and a porn shop took it's place a few years later.) After the riot, police officer (and director of Community Relations), Elliot Blackstone pioneered services and helped to overturn many anti-transgender laws, thus improving conditions for the transgender community in San Francisco. Many transgender individuals at the riots also noted the marked change in the community:
"Out of Compton's [riots] came some very beautiful, beautiful women. We felt good about ourselves. And that's the most interesting part of it, because once you feel good about yourself, nobody can hurt you. Nobody can come in and turn anything around that you don't want."
Through her research, Stryker found that while the Stonewall Riots of June 28th, 1969 are typically cited as the birthplace of the modern LGBTQ rights movement, the Compton Cafeteria Riots were actually one of the first radical acts against police and institutional trans/homophobia in America. Stryker's work was instrumental in sheding light to this important and watershed event in our LGBTQ history (and if you notice on the Wiki page, Stryker is the primary reference of the entire account). She interviewed people in the Tenderloin district of San Francisco who she believed might have been present at the event, and collected first-hand knowledge of the riots through interviews and personal accounts.
Thus, we have Stryker to thank for uncovering an incredible part of our community's history; "the story was bigger than I could have ever imagined", she says of the night. Stryker also said that researching the riots made her feel the presence of a larger transgender and drag community; I think it's awesome that we can look to this group of empowered individuals in our community as a source of courage and strength.
Born in 1969 in England, Shamim Sarif is a current writer and filmmaker. She has received numerous awards on her works as both an author and as a screenwriter and film director ("Best Director" at the South African Film Festival, World Cinema Best Director), and more informally she won an AfterEllen.com 2008 Visiblity Award as the "International Lesbian/Bisexual Woman of the Year". Another fun fact: her and her partner, Hannan Kattan, formed their own entertainment production company called "Enlightenment Productions". This is remeniscent of queer women creating their own spaces when the current system just doesn't cut it, such as Joan Jett from two weeks ago, who formed her own recording label-and was the first woman to ever do so.
Sarif's first film and novel, The World Unseen, is a story set in Cape Town, South Africa at the beginning of apartheid in the 1950s. Sarif herself has a personal connection to South Africa, as both her parents and grandparents were born and lived there. The story surronds two Indian South African women who work against the racism, sexism, homophobia and political tensions that they encounter in their lives.
The World Unseen (2008 release)
Sarif has also released I Can't Think Straight, as a film and novel, which is a modern-day story of two women in London who navigate family and cultural prescriptions about sexuality. If you watch the two trailers, you'll notice that Sarif uses the same actresses, Lisa Ray and Sheetal Sheth in both films, which is sort of an interesting and unique connection between the two films.
I personally really admire Shamim Sarif for making films of substance about LGBTQ women, especially regarding policital/cultural themes. As an openly lesbian herself, Sarif is a role model for visibility in addition to her accomplishments as a filmmaker and author. I've also seen both these movies, and I think I'd definitely rank them both in the top 10 LGBTQ women's films that I've seen, so if you have any free time over break, definitely check them out!
And lastly, if you like these films/novels, Sarif actually has more LGBTQ women's movies in the making: her second novel "Despite the Falling Snow" is being filmed now, and is a lesbian story set in Cold War Stalinist Moscow. I'm personally impressed by the initiative in which Sarif has decided to use her talent as an author and director to advance LGBTQ women's visibility, and I hope other openly LGBTQ women and their allies are motivated by her films and openness.
Announcement--->THIS Thursday, at 8:30pm in the Center for LGBT Life, we're going to watch Saving Face! There will be blankets, popcorn, and friendly people. All are welcome to attend!
I'm writing about Alice Wu this week, because I personally believe that she has single-handedly wrote and directed the BEST lesbian movie I've ever seen: Saving Face. I haven't seen every LGBTQ-themed movie, that's for sure, but I feel this is one of the funnier, (sexier?), and more realistic movies about LGBTQ women that I've seen.
Wu actually has a really interesting background entering the film industry which I think is part of what makes her a role model. She graduted from Stanford University with a B.S. in Computer Science, and she started working for Microsoft in 1990. While she was at Microsoft, she wrote the story for Saving Face, and eventually enrolled in a screenwriting course on the side. Her screenwriting instructor encouraged her to leave Microsoft and pursue her film-writing career. Five years later, she produced the film and released Saving Face in 2005.
The screenplay won the CAPE award in 2001, (Coalition of Asian Pacifics in Entertainment), and the film itself was nominated for a GLAAD and Gotham award, and won the "Viewers Choice Award" at the 2005 Golden Horse Film Festival, which is sort of Taiwan's equivalent of the Acadamy Awards. The storyline of Saving Face, according to Wu, is largely autobiographical and focuses on her coming out experience as a Chinese-lesbian woman. Due to it's similarity to her own life, she knew that releasing the movie would out her to her family friends, which she has stated was both rewarding and nerve-wracking:
“It was kind of nerve-wracking to show it to my own mother. My own coming out experience was very similar in some ways to that depicted in the film, but even though my mom was very quiet on the subject of my being gay she’s still always been supportive. It might have taken ten years and a bit of estrangement, but we still love one another and even when she was having trouble understanding mom always only wanted what was best for me. That said, I had to be really clear with her about the subject matter [of the film]. I told her, ‘When this comes out, all your friends will know.’ All she said to me was, ‘This is what I want for you.’ God, that’s love!”
In an interview with New York Magazine about the film, Wu also explains how she made the film a "comedy", despite the relative serious nature of coming out (and the threat of a negative reaction) of the female protagonist:
"I know: A woman gets disowned at 48? Not so funny. There's pain and more pain. But people do weird things and life is funny. The characters don't think its funny-but their situations are just so impossible."
In an AfterEllen interview, Wu also describes the meaning behind the film's title, and its cultural significance:
"Often I think of it as more of an Asian notion, although the concept of it is very universal across many cultures. The way I understood it, growing up is that there is this sense that what you present to the world may not be who you are inside, but there is a responsibility when you come from an immigrant community--even though I was born in the states, my parents were immigrants--so there was this sense of wanting to be the perfect citizen. On some level I’m representing all Chinese people to Americans, even though, technically, I’m an American. So, if you do anything to shame yourself, you’re not just shaming yourself, your shaming an entire community. Also, in terms of the film, Wil is a reconstructive surgeon, who specializes in faces, and her mother works as an aesthetician at a salon, giving facials. There is that double entendre."
As a viewer, all I can say is that I'm so excited to see what Wu decides to do next, considering she's only just begun. Also, if you'd like to watch Saving Face, we'll see you this Thursday at 8:30pm! [all are welcome!] If you can't watch it with us, but would like to see it at a different time, I also know that there is a copy in Lilly Library that circulates outside the building. =) See you soon!
[In addition to all of our awesome visible and identifying columnists, we also have some awesome anonymous columnists that for one reason or another must use a pseudonym (and pseudopic?). Details on anonymous columnists here.]
When I get stressed out, I like to indulge in the things that I couldn't get enough of as a kid. I color. I draw spirographs. I eat bigsquare crackers (as my family still calls them). And recently, I watched Mulan again.
Mulan came out when I was nine, and I watched it obsessively as a kid. Since realising I am trans I've been joking that it should've been a hint that the only "Disney princess" I ever identified with spent half her time as a man. But I haven't actually seen it since coming to my epiphany, and... well, I cried. A lot. But mostly in the good way.
I think Mulan might be the perfect movie for gender-non-conforming kids whose families expect them to be girls. Let me tell you what I see when I watch Mulan.
First, this montage is pretty much about drag for me:
In my mind, much of femininity (like masculinity) consists of a performance, and this sequence highlights that. (I'm trying to draw a distinction here between gender and gender expression. It's the latter that involves the most social construction.) For a lot people the performance comes naturally, feels congruent, and is even enjoyable-- if this is how you feel about the gender you were assigned at birth, congratulations, you're cisgendered! It probably doesn't even feel like a performance to you. I still feel like many of my gendered actions (like my choice in clothes) are performative, but because they feel congruent now, I simply feel like I am expressing my gender, rather than going around in drag.
Mulan, here and elsewhere in the movie, is pretty unhappy about having to perform femininity, and it seems clear to me that it's not really an expression of who she is. Which is why, to me, the montage is about drag.
In the next sequence, with the matchmaker, it becomes clear that Mulan isn't just uncomfortable with femininity-- she is a big failure at it.
I always really empathized with Mulan here, as a kid. She is trying so hard! It just doesn't come naturally to her, so she fails, fails, fails. Just like I always did. The clumsiness is particularly familiar to me-- I am incredibly clumsy, and nowadays I attribute it to my fundamental discomfort with my body. I bump my too-large hips into corners and doorways, and I actually knock things off my desk with my breasts with embarrassing regularity. It's hard to be graceful when you're fundamentally uncomfortable in your own skin.
And now, for the song that makes me cry every single time I hear it:
Seriously. Those lyrics. Literally every single line deserves to be quoted, as the narrative of a young transboy's coming out:
Look at me.
I will never pass for a perfect bride
Or a perfect daughter.
Can it be
I'm not meant to play this part?
Now I see
That if I were truly to be myself
I would break my family's heart.
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight
Back at me?
Why is my reflection someone
I don't know?
Somehow I cannot hide
Who I am
Though I've tried.
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
Yeah, I choked up just typing that. I was going to say something about the vocabulary-- passing as a daughter, playing the part, etc.-- but it's too close to my heart for an English-class close reading. This was the song my heart sang for ten years. It speaks for itself.
The best part of Mulan, though, is that it offers hope. Mulan's father tells her to learn her place, and she goes, "Okay, you know what my place is? The fucking army." And... she does it! Ping becomes a fucking war hero! Ping succeeds at masculinity just as much as Mulan originally failed at femininity. Sure, it's a little rough at first, but it's rough for all the men, and the movie explains how to get better:
Isn't that, like, the least-toxic definition of How To Be A Man that you've ever seen? This song is the song of my heart right now. Swift as a river, force of a typhoon, strength of a fire, mysterious as the moon. Gotcha. I can do that!
The parts where Ping is in the army are my favourites of the whole movie, because they just make me so happy. I always feel that I am watching the story of Ping, as he embraces his identity and kicks ass. That moment when all his friends cheer on the snowy mountaintop, after he has saved the army, the country, and his boyfriend-- it's such a perfect crowning moment.
Except, of course, for the fact that the movie keeps going. Here is where I begin to feel conflicted. The story requires Ping to become Mulan again. It always breaks my heart, just like Christine Daniels' transition back to Mike Penner. I just can't understand how Ping can go back. I mean, I definitely understand the societal pressures, and once Ping has been outed he doesn't exactly have a lot of options, but-- how can I accept this as the best possible ending for him?
Mulan gets everything I wanted as a kid. She gets to hug the emperor and she gets to hug her dad, and they love her. She gets the guy, and he loves her. But she only gets the happy ending because she puts the dress back on. Can't people love me when I am myself?
Like with the reflection song, I lose my facility with words at this point. So I am moving on.
This scene is super gratuitous in the movie-- seriously, they didn't have to get all dressed up just to climb those pillars, as Shang himself demonstrates-- and so my inclusion of the clip is also gratuitous:
I particularly like the reprise of the "Be A Man" song. Sure, maybe for most people it's seen as ironic-- but to me, it's saying that maybe "being a man" can include wearing dresses just for fun.
So maybe the movie doesn't give us a perfect transgender narrative-- but it does seem to imagine a radical re-definition of how we understand gender expression, and I think that can be enough. If nothing else, I am glad to have had this:
A montage that makes transitioning look epic. With swords! Everything a nine-year-old needs.
Hey all, I just wanted to alert everyone about the Full Frame Film Festival happening this weekend in Durham (it actually opened tonight). This is The Festival's 13th year.
I was going through the list of featured films and saw some had LGBT themes. Here's a brief list I compiled with synopses (directly from the site) and their respective showtime information. Just to be clear, I've not seen any of these and I'm not "endorsing" any of them or their viewpoints. Though, hopefully some of you will be able to attend one or more over the weekend. Be sure to let us know what you thought of it! You could even write blog post review of the film! Tickets are $10 each...see this link for more information.
[Ed. Note: Every other Tuesday, Ari will be reviewing gay-themed movies. No, not those kind (ask him in person for those reviews). I swear by his judgment in films, and you should too :) ]
A film's ability to separate politics from the universal struggles of its characters can be considered its finest achievement. In Eytan Fox’s second gay-themed film “The Bubble” (Ha-Buah in Hebrew), the director hopes we as an audience do exactly that; put ourselves out there and perhaps gain new perspective by leaving our politics at the door. “The Bubble” is certainly as politically charged as it gets, tackling such issues as the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, gay love, and naïve activism. Although in the foreground of the story, Tel Aviv plays a vital role in establishing the ever-growing liberal mindset the city has instilled in its people. The title refers to the fact that this city has become isolated, in recent years, from the turmoils and civil struggles between Jews and Palestinians that occur just outside of its borders.
Every week, we collect anonymous entries sent in using the link on our sidebar and post them all on Monday. We post anything as long as it doesn't contain personal attacks, hate speech, or express or insinuate that one is at risk for hurting themselves or someone else. Please read this for an explanation of this policy and seek help if your or a friend find yourself in that position. With those exceptions aside, please feel free to submit your thoughts and questions. :)
