In collaboration with Ebony Way, we have decided to tag team these posts. We hope this is an effective medium and method to discuss a common topic of interest between writers. While Ebony Way discusses her influence with her little brother in her post, I will discuss my older sister's influence on me.
My sister is four years older than me, so between middle school, high school, and college, we've never been at the same school together. Which is perhaps a good thing, because she was able to tell me things I would need to know.
My sister and I never had a strong relationship. I mean, we are brother and sister, I do not think we are meant to have a good relationship. Then again, we were always busy, so most of our talks were fighting for something, in the interest of time.
Oh, did I mention that my sister is gay? 'Cause that's important to know. I always joke about how some chromosomes just didn't split correctly over the four years, but it happened, regardless.
We have never talked about our lives with each other. While I often feel that never cementing a strong relationship with my sister has not been a huge issue, I feel that never talking to her about being gay and vice versa has been an issue. I know that I can learn so much from her, yet I have not taken the time. I never even personally told her that I am gay.
However, I'm okay with that.
I've never had an easy time telling people that I'm gay. I find that I'd rather let people figure it out for themselves, or even ask. I refer back to labels, and my disgust for labels. I do not like being branded with labels. Whether it is gay, smart Asian, nerd, geek, or any other label, I despise these labels. People are more than words can describe, but often people generalize for every label, and gay is absolutely no exception to the rule. For one, I don't think it is necessary to immediately let people know that I am gay. My straight friends didn't introduce themselves to me as straight, so why should I introduce myself as gay to them? Also, I'm not a different person because I am gay. I am still me, but it just so happens that I'm gay; it really is not that big of a deal. It is analogous to how my roommate folds his pizza before eating it, or how my friend says her a's different; it is not a big deal, it just makes us unique. I would continue to elaborate, but I am afraid I've already taken my tangent too far.
My sister is the athlete in the family. She does crew, she plays soccer, softball, flag football, and pretty much most intramural sports that her college offers. I never had this athletic talent, and I envy her for that (although I am a quidditch player, so I guess there is some athleticism in me). I've always looked up to her as a role model for succeeding in college and life, and I hope that I can only succeed as well as she has.
I also look up to her as one of my LGBT models. Her girlfriend and her have been together for many years, and I only hope that I can emulate that sometime in my future. I know she doesn't read this, but if she does, I do love you very much, and I can't thank you enough for being a role model for me, even though I barely see you.