Yes! It Rained on my Parade : )

So Saturday was the NC Pride Parade. If you were cool enough to attend you know it was an awesome event filled with all things queer and if you were not able to attend, rummage through Facebook and try to live vicariously through the photos.  This was my first pride parade, and it forced me to reflect on my two-year journey from shame to pride. Witting this post about Pride reminded me of an anonymous post over the summer that pretty much asked “what’s the point of Pride ?” The anonymous poster believed that we don’t have the right to show pride for the accomplishments of other, and that in general we should not express pride for innate attributes like being LGBT. At first I got all defensive about Pride, but then I decided to really reflect on gay pride, and ask myself why it is so important to me.

For me, Pride is not only about celebrating the struggle and accomplishments of those who came before, but also celebrating my own transformation. In talking about Pride, I think it’s important to know the history (I’m a history major so I always think the history is important).  The first Pride parade was held in 1970 to mark the anniversary of the Stonewall Riots.  Last week a close (queer) friend of mine admitted that he didn’t know what stonewall was, and that confession pushed me into a deep sense of depression. So if your reading this and don’t know…There is a Wikipedia page calling your name. In a nutshell, Stonewall was a two-day riot outside of a gay club in NYC, which sparked the modern gay rights movement. (Sorry for the history lesson, but it is LGBT history month) The parade that happened on Saturday owes its roots to a stand some brave queers made 43 years ago, and I do think that’s something to be proud of.  I am proud because they stood up (and attacked the cops) so that I could live in a world that was a bit more tolerant.

            The second aspect of Pride, is the personal pride I have for my own journey, and the journey of those around me. It has been a long and difficult journey from a dark closet to a float in a parade. For me Pride was a way to celebrate my own transformation into a person that can be proud of who I am. Even more than that, Pride is an opportunity to be validated by others in a way not commonly experienced. I spent most of my life being told that queer was wrong, but on Saturday I had thousands of people cheering me on telling me that who I am is beautiful.  I was proud of those who paved the way, proud of my own journey, and proud of the validation I receive from my community. Honestly…being queer is Great! In addition to multitude of Rainbows and natural birth control, we have a community that is strong, loving, and validating. That is something to take pride in, and that’s why I braved the cold rain to ride down a float dancing to Gaga.

(In my kindergarten teacher voice)...And remember ...You can't have a rainbow without rain

What Duke owes to its Queer students.

In a conversation I recently had with a top-level administrator about the relocation of the LGBT center I felt as if the historical struggle of Queer students on campus was being ignored. The conversation went a little something like this…

Me: “We feel as if the administration gives our issues less attention then they deserve, and less attention as compared to other minority groups on campus, most notably the Black Student Alliance.”

The response was something like this “ Well I can see why you may feel that way, but Duke has such a long history of racism that we have a long way to go with reconciliation with black students”

Me: Duke also has a long history of Homophobia, that the University needs to own up to”

The reply: “yes, but Duke never officially said you can’t come here if you are gay, but it did say you can’t come here if you are black”.

Now this explanation of LGBT second-class treatment, as you can imagine angered me a great deal. To be honest, it is an administrative copout! As you may have noticed I am BLACK and I am GAY, so this whole discussion does put me in a bit of an uncomfortable situation. That being said I think my double minority status also qualifies me to point out this discrepancy without fear of being call homophobic or racist. Duke University owes a great deal to its LGBT population for past and present sins committed, and NOW is the time to pay up!

After that conversation I decided to do some digging on the LGBT history of Duke, and the struggle our predecessors had to endure. This is some of what I found…

The fist queer student group was formed in 1972 and it was called Duke Gay Alliance. Students during this time reported harassment, ostracism, and a general sense of fear. One student from the 70s recounts that many gay students of the time were advised by the University to seek psychiatric help to correct their homosexuality.

In 1974 President Stanford denied the request to include sexual orientation into the Universities non-discrimination policy. This by default meant that the University condoned institutionalized discrimination against LGBT individuals.

In 1983 the student government dechartered the queer student organization, then known as Duke Gay and Lesbian alliance. The DSG dechartered the group because a University lawyer feared the group would “promote homosexuality”, which at the time was a crime.

In the 1990’s the University would form a LGBT task force and in 94 create the LGB center (note the lack of T) but things did not get much better for students on campus. In 1999 Duke was ranked as one of the most homophobic campuses in America by the Princeton review.

Even today the University still refuses to live up to its responsibility on LGBT issues. Even now in 2012 the university refuses to come out against amendment 1 as an institution.

Still today the university will not own up to its responsibility and provide us a LGBT center with sufficient staffing, space, and resources.

The university talks a big game, but now it is time for results. Duke University owes a lot to its LGBT population, and we deserve the same treatment and respect as everyone else. I resent the assertion, that another group should receive priority treatment because of the way some administrators measure discrimination.

This is why Queer alums don’t donate money to the University.

This is why many progressive p-proshes are skeptical out attending.

This is why so many of our peers are closeted, and fearful.

Duke University must embrace its responsibility to LGBT individuals, and if they can’t do it out of the goodness of their hearts, it is time we apply the pressure because…

We will not be second-class students on our own campus

We will not be relegated to the fringes of campus life.

We will not live in fear on our own campus and,

We will not be silenced or ignored.

Duke is my home, and all I am asking I to be treated fairly within my own home.

Just in Time for V-Day

Things I love about being with a(n) (incredible) woman:

• soft lips (both sets)
• general softness
• having our periods together (and not freaking out about it)
• passionately singing sappy country love songs
• doing our hair/makeup together
• drankin games with the boys
• holding hands on Main Street
• dancing at The Bar
• queer friends
• "duke standard of beauty"
• hi-top sneakers and hoodies
• orchids
• clit action
• uh-maayyyyzannn sex
• despite girls/guys' advances, she's coming home with me ; )
• random creeper: "so, do you have a man?" me: "nope. better" =)
• sugary sweetness
• home cookin
• thoughtfulness
• physical/emotional/intellectual stimulation
• nips
• sharing clothes (that actually fit)
• guys and girls complimenting how beautiful she is
• awesome journal entry material
• curves
• spooning
• squirting
• cuddling
• the L word references
• her lower back
• gender roles
• raising my hand in class when someone makes a heteronormative comment
• making the rules as we go
• healthy love
• peace
• sanity
• communication
• loving deliberately

The Evil We Deplore

On September 14, 2001, the U.S. House of Representatives took up House Joint Resolution 64, giving President Bush broad authority to pursue those responsible for the attacks of September 11th. The resolution would pass the Senate by a vote of 98-0 and the House by a vote of 420-1.

During debate on the floor, Rep. Barbara Lee (D-CA), the lone dissenting member of Congress, rose to speak. Overcome with emotion, she managed to eloquently state her fear of the US rushing to judgment and urged the use of restraint. She concluded her speech with the line, “As we act, let us not become the evil that we deplore.”

I feel that rushing to judgment is a large problem within the LGBT community, especially at Duke. Don’t get me wrong, I love the LGBT community here. I was skeptical of pride, but ended up going and having a fantastic time. For me, events like pride and coming out day strip away social pressures and enable me to experience new and freer dimensions of my personality. Sure, I don’t share identical hobbies and interests with every student that identifies as LGBT. God knows how hard it is to convince someone to sign up for an IM soccer team let alone drag them to a Duke football game.

Yet too often I find myself using my own hobbies and interests to try to carve out my own sphere of privilege within the LGBT community, to drive a stake between others and myself. Even more so, I find myself typecasting other groups on campus in an effort to reaffirm my identity - to place on a pedestal the communities I choose to belong to. Stereotypes often carry some degree of truth, but by no means are they universal within groups of people. Believe it or not, not all athletes and Christians are homophobes and not all frat kids are womanizing monsters. Yet living at Duke, it becomes difficult to move past the shallowness of these labels. It becomes hard to differentiate between and relate to groups you aren't in daily contact with. Often, the stereotype is all that lingers as a result.

My capacity for empathizing has fallen victim to father time and my personal Duke experience. Hindsight bias really is a nasty little bugger. Today, it seems ridiculous that I didn’t like heights, sushi, alcohol, or the color orange. I have a tendency to take every game in Cameron Indoor Stadium for granted. This morning, I pulled up a political science paper I wrote freshman year and realized I’ve retained nearly zero of that information.

Quite frankly, the further I move into the future, the harder time I have placing myself in the shoes of my 18-year-old self, the more difficult it becomes to take off and clean the glasses Duke has placed upon me. I’ve been blessed with a rather laissez-faire, free spirited personality and perspective on life. Being out has enabled me to move past the taxing, introspective state of being closeted. But too often I use that as an excuse to turn the other way. The pressure to fit in with your peers, existing definitions of masculinity, the fear of being solely defined by your sexuality, and the simple fear of the unknown are issues that wreak havoc on Duke students every day. These are salient issues that are shared by all members of the LGBT community.

Students who are comfortably out are a privileged group at Duke. We should not forget that. For a community that preaches tolerance, acceptance, and unity, too often we preoccupy ourselves highlighting our differences rather than cherishing what we have in common. As I strive to become a better learner, friend, athlete, worker, and person, I need to stop diminishing the currency in which I trade. I need to prevent myself from becoming the very stereotyping and polarizing evil I deplore.

Duke is fantastic, but let us not forget those who remain silent, and let us not forget the younger versions of ourselves.

LGBTQ Female Role Models: Dorothy Allison [at DUKE!]

Who is Dorothy Allison?

To begin, Dorothy Allison is the feminist and queer writer who is COMING to DUKE this Friday, September 23rd to give presentations around campus! [See the bottom of the post for event times and dates.]

Duke acquired Dorothy Allison's papers September of last year, and was excited to bring her work to our Rare Books and Manuscript, and Special Collections Library (RBMSCL) here at Duke. Born in Greenville, South Carolina, Allison is a natural fit as a Southern writer who is one of the foremost queer and feminist American writers of the 21st century in her fields.

As the first person in her family to graduate from high school or college, Allison studied anthropology in Eckerd College on a National Merit scholarship, and pursued graduate studies at Florida State University. She held a variety of jobs, and later

moved to NYC, where she enrolled in The New School (a historically progressive academic college in NYC) and in 1981 recieved her M.A. in urban anthropology. While in college, Allison credits a feminist "collective" for introducing her to feminism and credits "militant feminists" for encouraging her to write.

Allison is both a non-fiction and fiction writer, writing novels such as Cavedweller, which brings up issues on class, sexuality, female bonds, domestic violence, Southern society, child sexual abuse, and non-fiction pieces such as "The Women Who Hate Me", which was a response of Allison to critics of her political and social activism. Winner of three Lambda Book Awards, the Lesbian Book award and the National Book Award (p.s. Alice Walker won the National Book Award too! Notice a queer women's authorship trend??) today she continues to write and is a visiting professor at Emory University and Davidson College.

Her social activism takes varied forms, and she is one of the co-founders of the "Lesbian Sex Mafia" in New York City, a LGBTQ women's support group that promotes safer sex regardless of sexual preferences and type of sexual act, emphasizing a woman's choice, unihibited gender and sexual expression, consent, and BDSM.

After realizing Dorothy Allison was coming to Duke-I decided to start reading her collection of semi-autobiographical short stories, "Trash", which has won the Lambda and Lesbian Book Awards. It's moving and powerful and vulnerability and strength all in the same text:

"There was a day in my life when I decided to live..."

"I became an escapee-one of the ones others talk about. I became the one who got away, who got glasses from the Lions Club, a job from Lyndon Johnson's War on Poverty, and finally went to college on a scholarship."

"Even now I cannot believe how it was that everything I survived became one more reason to want to die."

"I wrote out my memories of the women. My terror and lust for my own kind; the souts and arguments; the long, slow glances and slower approaches; the way my hands always shook when I would finally touch the flesh I could barely admit I wanted, the way I could never ask for what I wanted, never accept it if they offered....-all the stories of my family, my childhood, and the relentless deadening poverty and shame I had always tried to hide because I knew no one would believe what I could tell them about it."

"I write stories...I put on a page a third look at what I've seen in life-the condensed and reinvented experience of a cross-eyed working clas lesbian, addicted to violence, language and hope, who has made the decision to live, is determined to live, on the page and on the street, for me and mine."

-Dorothy Allison, "Trash" (1988).

Here at Duke we are lucky enough to have prominent scholars and leaders in various fields come to our campus, to give lectures to students, engage us, and allow us to ask questions that explore their works. Don't miss this chance to meet Dorothy Allison and discuss her works in person!

Where can we meet Dorothy Allison?

Two or Three Things: Readings from the Works of Dorothy Allison

Thursday, September 22, 4:00 p.m.

Biddle Rare Book Room, Perkins Library

Dorothy Allison in Conversation with Students

Friday, September 23, 12:00 p.m.

Center for LGBT Life

Out in the South: Writers in Conversation Featuring Dorothy Allison, Shirlette Ammons, Jim Grimsley, and Minnie Bruce Pratt

Friday, September 23, 7:00 p.m.

White Lecture Hall, East Campus

[See the Duke University Sallie Bingham Center for Women's History and Culture in the RBMSCL website for more information, here.]

WOMYN Wednesday

Happy Wednesday, y’all! Just to remind you, submissions to WOMYN’s second issue are due September 16, 2011! We’re super-excited about this issue – it’s going to be so awesome, because all of you are awesome, and so are your submissions (without your voices, WOMYN’s awesomeness quotient is going to suffer, though. Just sayin’.) So please send your poetry, prose, cartoons, photographs, etc. to womynatduke@gmail.com!!! And now, it’s time for the first WOMYN Wednesday Poll of the summer:

Do you feel comfortable coming to the LGBT Center?

(Click here to take survey)

Although this question isn’t directed specifically or exclusively to queer women, it’s an important question to ask, because it applies to everyone, queer or not.

There’s been a lot of discussion this past year, both on and off the BDU Blog, about the LGBT Center at Duke. In fact, at times this discussion has approached argument status, mostly due to the apparently polarizing nature of this space on campus. (Disclaimer: the following is based on what the writer, Jennifer, has seen/heard, and should not be taken as a reflection of anyone else’s experience or opinion.)

The Duke LGBT community is made up of many different kinds of people – some are very active, out, and open, while others are not. Many of the most out and open members are often the most vocal and visible LGBT people to the rest of the Duke community. (And let’s not forget the awesome allies who stand beside us – they’re one of the As in LGBTQQIAA, and their support and advocacy makes a positive impact every day.) A significant number of these members of the LGBT community tend to hang out in the Center on a regular basis, whether it’s for Fab Friday, for one of the several discussion groups hosted by the Center, or just to do homework, surf the web, and chat with friends. These people are sometimes referred to as “The Community” or “The Center Gays,” usually in a negative context.

There are other LGBT people here at Duke who do not regularly come to the Center. That’s fine – that’s awesome, in fact. Coming to the Center is not a requirement, and far be it from anyone to force others to go anywhere against their will. Sometimes the Center seems downright scary, especially for those who are questioning, closeted, or new to Duke. Some might see the Center as superfluous or confining.

The fact that there is such a division (these two groups are broad generalizations) within Duke’s LGBT community is not bad, nor is it unexpected. But sometimes we seem a mere hop, skip, and jump away from a really hurtful conflict, which is bad. A blog post addressing this issue happened earlier this year, as did some discussions in comments on the blog. There was even a meeting about it. However, after some comments on the Anonymous Posts this week, it appears that we haven’t yet resolved the discussion. So, please take the survey – your responses will be a helpful addition to the discussion. (Do avoid any obviously inflammatory language in your comments, both on this post and within the survey – the survey is not meant to start an argument. On the contrary, we want a constructive conversation, so that there will be no need to discuss this issue further. )

The Best and Worst Semester of My Life

Four months. Dozens of drinks. Hundreds of tears. A thousand smiles. And so many meaningful relationships formed. This has been my semester at Duke and it has been the worst and best semester of my college experience.

Why do you do what you do? This was the question I posed on my first blog post. The most uncomfortable part about being at Duke this semester was my inability to answer this question and others: Why did you act in that way—that is not you so why do you care if they like you or not? Why did you hook up with that guy—do you really like him in that way? Why are you involved in this organization—do you really believe in the work you are doing?

It has been the worst in many ways: I continuously struggled with being in love but knowing that I have to get over him; I witnessed self-destructive behavior and interpersonal violence in the forms of binge drinking and sexual assault; I dealt with extremely low self-esteem and guilt over being (what I thought of myself as) an unfit son, brother, and friend. I was dropped into new social circles and was left awake at night thinking, “I wonder if they like me or not…they probably don’t…” (it felt like my first-year of high school and college all over again); all of these things made me feel even more isolated and uncomfortable around people who identify as LGBTQ as I felt like I had to act in certain ways to fit in; many stereotypes regarding gay people were reinforced for me this semester…

It all kind of collapsed one night on the rocking chairs in the Plaza. I was a mess, and didn’t feel like going to bed because I was so tired of not wanting to wake up in the morning and face the world. I spilled out all of these feelings to my best friend, and he helped me by saying this: “Look, you may not want to get over some of this, but you have to—look to the future and what makes you excited, what makes you happy.” Duke necessarily wasn’t the reason why I felt like all of this, but it definitely was hard to be in a new environment with new people dealing with some old/new issues. I decided to go for a run that night (Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don’t shoot their husbands, right?) and underwent a pretty awesome catharsis.

That night was important because I drew from my past, assessed my present, and then ran towards the future. That run was a little more than a week ago, and has allowed me to think about the how my semester at Duke has been the best in countless ways—and though the negative parts of my semester were attributed to things that went beyond my semester at Duke, the positive aspects of my semester were rooted in the Blue Devil experience:

I made SO many AMAZING friends and built upon my existing friendships in meaningful, loving ways; I dived deep into my coursework and it has been the most enjoyable academic journey of my life; I relied on myself for things that I hadn’t previously; I broke down so many stereotypes about this place, especially in regards to Greek Life; I confronted my issues with not feeling like I “fit in” in this college gay culture and tried to even determine what gay culture was at Duke and at UNC to begin with; I was single for what felt like the first time during my college experience and, though it was hard, it was rewarding; and, finally, I realized how comfortable I was at Duke—how great it was to be able to walk to class and see a familiar face, or having friends to call and get dinner with! What a joy it is to have these experiences…

I see now that these are things that I will remember from my semester at Duke. Thus, here are my lasting thoughts, inspired by this quote I read in an article (can't remember the name of it...):

"We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments. But great moments often catch us unaware—beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one."

Regardless of being a student at Duke or UNC, you can get down in the dumps about a lot of things happening in life. The solution: find the beauty around you—whether this beauty is in the people you meet and the relationships formed, your classes and any knowledge gained, or the trees, flowers, and buildings that populate our universities. Challenge yourself to embrace the uncomfortable, but don’t do so in a way that forces you to detach from what makes you most like you. For me, it was my family, my friends (from Carolina and Duke), and swimming.

Even though it is a bittersweet end as I leave Duke to return to Carolina in the fall, I am so excited that there are so many opportunities for me to maintain what I experienced at Duke.

Cheers to a paradoxical semester—the best and worst four months of my life, each second spent learning about myself and others, cultivating pluralism along the way.

See you on the lighter (and arguably better) shade of blue,

A Tar Devil

BDU Wins 2010 - 2011 Outstanding Established Student Organization Leadership and Service Award!

Hey everyone,

Quick piece of exciting news - Blue Devils United was honored tonight at the Duke University Leadership Awards. We won the 2010 - 2011 Outstanding Established Student Organization Leadership and Service Award!

Congratulations to everyone who's been involved with BDU this year: this is a fantastic recognition of your work and you should be very proud.

Healthy Confrontation

As my semester at Duke slowly comes to an end, I realize how much my routine reflects that of the average Duke student: I have worked hard (kind of), played hard (REAL hard) and have, more often than not, taken what Chronicle writer Ryan Brown describes as the “something bigger than ourselves” mentality.
My semester at Duke, unlike my previous semesters at UNC, has forced me to face many unfortunate realities. One of these realities is the palpable sense of destructive gender norms that exist in the world (and the notion that feminism is a bad thing); another is the existence of individuals who are, dare I say it, conservative!
[I am not saying destructive gender norms and conservatives do not exist at UNC; rather, I am saying that they exist behind a liberal curtain and (as recent weeks have demonstrated) a safe and inclusive university façade.]
At Duke, I have interacted with conservatives, with the “I’m not a feminist, but…” students, and with those that would fight till the end to maintain the existing gender culture at Duke. I have attended a handful of meetings at the Women’s Center and have had numerous conversations with individuals, both conservative and liberal and all in between, regarding feminism. Yet, like Brown, I prefer to push my headphones into my ear and pump up the volume rather than fighting complacency and, in turn, a destructive culture. I have these conversations, but then I go on with my business, thinking to myself, “Well, we talked and they still didn’t get what I had to say…oh, well!”

What I have loved most about Duke, however, is the opportunity to have interacted with those that align themselves on the opposite sides of an issue. What I love about my semester here is the fact that I think about these things and realize my “something bigger than ourselves” mentality. And most of all, I love that I have more opportunities to not be complacent; to continue to have conversations with people, but also take action—to attend events such as Be A Man [Thursday (April 14th) at 8:30pm in McClendon 5] and Fab Friday with these people who have different views than my own.

Confrontation is uncomfortable, but healthy confrontation can be life-changing. So I encourage myself and others to have conversations with individuals who normally wouldn’t agree with you on an issue (such as feminism), befriend these individuals and listen to their stories, and then bring them to some healthy confrontational events (such as Be A Man or Fab Friday). Whether they change their minds or not is not what is important; what is important is us not subscribing to the “bigger than ourselves” mentality and taking action AND making new friends.

If there is nothing else to bond over, you and your new friend can always bond over being Blue Devils, a community I am honored to be a part of during my college experience.

"Duke Gay"

I was offered admission to Duke University exactly one year ago today, but at the time I was justifiably concerned about a different kind of acceptance.

At 5:00 pm, I found out of my acceptance and by 5:01 I was wondering about LGBT life at Duke. The first phrase I searched on the internet was the first that came to mind: “Duke gay.” Whether this reflects my poor knowledge of Google’s search algorithms or simply my nervous excitement, I’m not sure.

What was I looking for? I’m not sure. I’ll tell you what I’ve since found, though.

Duke’s Center for LGBT Life is a great resource and the students that frequent it form a great community. Duke has many LGBT students representing all backgrounds. How many students? I won’t lie and say that we’re a Yale or a Smith, but there are enough students for a diverse, strong, and outspoken community. There are alternatives to this community, though—many openly LGBT students don’t have anything to do with the Center and are perfectly happy. The LGBT dating scene is strong, though the LGBT hookup scene is stronger. But that’s just college, right?

Openly gay students rarely rush fraternities and sororities, but it isn’t unheard of. Selective living groups—typically coed and accepting—are popular alternatives to Greek life, providing networking opportunities and social outlets without rigid gender roles or a stressful rush process.

While there is always room for improvement, the Administration has a history of LGBT support. In addition to funding the Center for LGBT life, it maintains a strong anti-discrimination policy inclusive of sexual orientation. That chapel you’ve seen or heard so much about? Yeah, it hosts same-sex ceremonies.

And don’t write Duke off, like I almost did, just because it’s in the South. Duke is in Durham, which has recently been crowned the Lesbian Capital of the South. Not lesbian? That’s okay, too- Durham, along with Raleigh and Chapel Hill form a region known as the Research Triangle, a moderately liberal oasis within the Bible-Belt. In 2009, openly gay Town Councilman Mark Kleinshmidt ran for and won the office of Mayor of Chapel Hill, which I see as a positive indicator of the region’s social progressiveness.

If you’ve recently been accepted to Duke University, I extend my congratulations. I hope this post and this blog are helpful to you and I encourage you to ask any questions you may have in the comment section. I also recommend that you attend Blue Devil Days to get a feel for campus culture, academic, social, and otherwise.

Oh, and did I mention that NC Pride ran right past my dorm last September?

"Fab" Friday?

I invite you to stop by Duke's Center for LGBT Life today from 4-6 for "Fab Friday." But I think you should know that the Center is frequented by more than just the fab*.

Among the regular attendees of Fab Friday and other events at the Center are:

Sports enthusiasts

Women

Athletes

Allies

Frat-stars

Pratt-stars

Sorority sisters

Conservatives

Liberals

Artists

Scientists

Musicians

(Future) Politicians

Tar-Heels

Blue Devils

Potential friends.

So if you have preconceived notions of the types of people that go (or don't go) to the Center, I'd advise you to come by this afternoon. I think you'll pleasantly surprised.

*Not that theres anything wrong with being fab, of course.

WOMYN Wednesday!

[WOMYN magazine is excited to announce that we will be featuring polls from our community in the magazine! The general goal of WOMYN magazine is to increase the visibility of LGBTQ women on this campus.]

BIG NEWS: The submission deadline for WOMYN magazine is in 7 DAYS, or NEXT WEDNESDAY!!! Don't miss out on a chance to publish your thoughts in this semester's publication! Email us your piece at womynatduke@gmail.com within the next week!

This week's WOMYN poll is:

"Would you speak up in class if you heard the following comment?" (see below)

Click here to vote! (We've also left a comment box for additional ideas or past experiences.)

****

The following situtation happened in a Duke classroom last week:

In an 8:30am class, within the first 20 minutes of discussion, the conversation turns towards gender. One student in the classroom says, "My friend likes reading Glamour, Cosmo and watching Gossip Girl...but I mean, he's totally normal-he likes girls....".

No one in the class stopped the discussion to remind this student that her comment excluded roughly 10% of the population at large. Do you think you would have spoken up?

(You can view the results of the poll in WOMYN magazine when it hits campus late fall semester!)

[Photo credit: Upper Right, Matt Lyons: pimc2cm@gmail.com]

****

Want to submit to WOMYN magazine? Click here to look at some ideas of what to submit. All are highly encouraged to submit - LGBTQ and straight-allied. Anyone with a Duke affiliation is eligible to write for WOMYN, including alumni, staff, faculty, undergraduate and graduate students alike.

Check out our website for more information on how to submit, and feel free to email us with any questions you might have: womynatduke@gmail.com.

Womyn Wednesday!

[WOMYN magazine is excited to announce that we will be featuring polls from our community in the magazine! We want to hear what you have to say about LGBT issues, queer women and Duke! The general goal of WOMYN magazine is to increase the visiblity of queer women on this campus. A special thank-you to Chris Perry, the editor of the BDU blog!]

Thank you to everyone who participated in last week's poll. The responses were really great, and if you haven't voted yet you still can. We would also like to announce that the deadine for submissions to WOMYN magazine is September 15th. Click here to look at some ideas of what to submit. (Remember that submissions are rolling, so the sooner you submit, the better!)

This week's WOMYN poll is: "Does Duke seem like a safe place for someone to come out of the closet? Have you come out of the closet at Duke? Why or why not?"

Click here to take this week's WOMYN poll. Or answer in the comments section below!

The now nationwide slogan, "Gay? Fine by Me." originated at Duke back in 2003. Do we, as Duke students, still feel this way today? The goal of WOMYN is to increase the visibility of queer women on this campus, and it is intrisically linked to this question. The presence of out, visible LGBTQ students on Duke's campus changes everything. This week's question is complex, because even after telling that first friend on the quad or finally outing yourself in the middle of a class, the process is continual and much larger than a single yes or no. Therefore, this week we decided to leave an open blank in the poll so that you can tell us your comments, ideas and personal experiences of coming out at Duke in addition to your vote. Surveymonkey.com is completely anonymous, but if you would like to include your name (and a brief note of your affiliation to Duke) in your response to have your quote appear in the magazine, we would definitely love that as well.

Want to view the results? Check out the UPB newstands when WOMYN is realesed on campus in late October!

Upper Image: National Coming Out Day logo created and donated by Keith Haring to the Human Rights Campaign.
Middle: Matt Lyons, Trinity '10 (pimc2cm@gmail.com)
Contact WOMYN by email (womynatduke@gmail.com) or by visiting our website.

Anonymous Posts (5.10.10-5.16.10)

Every week, we collect anonymous entries sent in using the link on our sidebar and post them all on Monday. We post anything as long as it doesn't contain personal attacks or hate speech. Feel free to submit your thoughts and questions :)

OMG. I am currently on my lunch break at the Human Rights Campaign in DC where I started my internship today. Being here is pretty surreal and this is going to be The Best Summer without a doubt.

Of course, my work here pales in comparison to the hours I spent trying to get the Facebook Share widgets to work on our blog posts. Apparently, HTML stands for Hard TML because of how hard it is to code. But hey! The widgets are installed and ready for All of You to use. Please do! We can tell from analytics that the traffic on the site is directly proportional to the number of people that post our columns on their Facebook wall. So help Us out!

#1
I ran away to Duke because I wanted to escape. Escape the pain. Escape the judgment. Escape the tears of a place most call "home." I wanted to create a new me: too strong to be hurt, too courageous to be scared, too assured to question. But I couldn't escape. Even worse, the pain, judgment and tears stripped the "new me" naked. I no longer knew who I was; I was so lost. I have never felt more alone.

On a whim, I decided to apply for Common Ground. There I heard a story of a young man who had felt so alone and so lost that life wasn't worth living, but instead of giving up he came to embrace the best he could ever hope to be - himself.

Each day since then (some days are better than others), I have tried to love myself. Working to embrace the best that I can ever hope to be - myself. In this daily struggle, I have come across some of the most remarkable stories; many from those who have had similar experiences. I'm now blessed to call these people my friends. I no longer feel alone in this journey we call life.

Many of my friends have dedicated their time at Duke to sharing their stories, reaching out to people who may feel alone and even to those whose actions make them feel pain.

I hope that this documentary (link), a collage of experiences and reflections, can help them continue this incredible work.

#2
this might sound completely ridiculous, but I'm worried about entering a relationship with somebody I've grown close to because I don't know how to have lesbian sex. I wonder if straight people realize how easy they have it. i'm scared shitless that I will be physically incapable of giving a woman an orgasm in a way that makes both us satisfied.

Anti-Hate Speech Campaign Photo Shoot!!

Calling all BDUers or LGBT and Ally Identified Students at Duke!!

You may know that a committee of BDU has been working on an anti-hate speech campaign. Well, we've got it mostly figured out. And now we need your help to make it come to fruition!

We've chosen to use black/gray scale and purple (cause purple is just the best color, is there any question about that?). We'll have three different posters (see below). The campaign tag line is: Hate speech hurts. No homo(phobia).

Poster 1) Some posters will be modeled after GLSEN's "Think B4 You Speak" Campaign. We'll be using the definition theme. We've chosed to create posters for "fag" and "dyke." GLSEN's definition posters are pictured below:

Poster 2) Some posters will feature two people with talking bubbles. Person A's talking bubble says "oh dude nice shoes...no homo" and Person B's talking bubble says "yeah, that ignorance really brings out your eyes."

Poster 3) Some posters will feature students like YOU. They will be formatted like GLSEN's (see picture below), but the text will say: "I'm gay. Your homework isn't." or "I'm gay. Your test isn't."

THE PHOTO SHOOT FOR THE ABOVE POSTER IS TODAY. AFTER THE BDU MEETING. AT THE CENTER FOR LGBT LIFE (02 WEST UNION).

PLEASE WEAR A PURPLE SHIRT AND JEANS. IF YOU DO NOT HAVE A PURPLE SHIRT PLEASE WEAR A BLACK ONE.

THANK YOU,

Brandy, Cody, Matt, Aliza, Risa, and Alyssa

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The Chronicle: Editorial "Phase in gender-neutral housing"

Did you see "The Chronicle" today? Well, take a gander when you have a chance: "When it comes to the issue of gender-neutral housing, it is time for Duke to follow suit with its peer institutions."

Props to Michelle Sohn.

Party Boy Chad, Psychosexual Revelations, G-Bombs, and Other Thoughts

As seems to happen in any class with sex on the syllabus, we ended up on the topic of the hook-up culture in my psych discussion section. It was the last one of the semester; I guess they figured they’d go out with a bang. We were assigned a few articles to read on the subject, some on research conducted by old white men in sterile laboratories, some on the findings of researchers who had actually been adventurous enough to go out into the field and take surveys. (Or so I gathered from reading the intro and conclusion, all I had time for before rushing to class.) All were dealing with straight couples, and the issues that they had as a result of anonymous sexual interaction.

It was one of the liveliest discussions our group has had. I hadn’t read the articles very thoroughly (i.e. not at all), so I sat back and took in what was going on around me. I’d heard it all before: the effects of alcohol, risk of disease, sexual assault, emotional issues. These are all serious subjects, but from the way the conversation was going, I was beginning to believe that only heteros had to deal with all that icky stuff. Whew, what a relief! Oh…wait…

So I resolved to bring up LGBT issues, to throw some color into the conversation.